Close but no porridge

There are few things finer in life than milk. Or so thinks Little Bear. Since the day he was born, the prospect of getting some boob or bottle has sent him into a feeding frenzy. After spotting the food, or hearing the milk machine buzzing, his eyes open wide, his nostrils flare, pupils dilate and his head starts wobbling from side-to-side as his snorts at the approaching teat.

​If you hesitate to put on a bib or sit him up straight you'll be greeted by a load, frustrated screech. 'How dare you delay the milk!' 

His milk trance is so deep, that when he drinks too fast [often], he'll pull the bottle to one side mid-feed, vomit half of what he just swallowed, then un-phased go straight back to eating, happily sitting in his puke.​

​Oddly, despite him being able to hold the bottle himself, it's become more difficult to avoid a mess as he's gotten older. For the last few months, when he's finished, he keeps chewing the teat, filing his mouth with milk then spitting it out... then laughing and repeating.

​More recently, just as he's discovered he can play with his digits, he's started to fill the bottle teat with milk, then squeeze. Yesterday he made a perfect aim for my eye which he also found funny. Less funny today when he squirted himself in the eye... 

We've been making our first attempts at weaning to solids over the last few weeks. Not a great record so far as his love affair with milk persists.
 
We've offered him carrot, cucumber, sweet-potato and just potato, but he wasn't having any of it. We've tried both baby and parent-led feeding, mashed and soft, mixed with milk and not, but whilst he's eaten it, he's not been enjoying himself. So far the only two things he'll actually eat without too much complaint other than milk are yogurt and plastic.

Plastic can really get him hyperventilating. He'll happily grab your sunglasses, water bottles or his spoon (providing there's no food on it), and happily go-to-town on it. He'll happily gorge himself on a piece of paper or a book, or even a stray piece of rubber or a table leg if he thinks someone might stop him.

​Give him mashed or solid carrot and he'll clamp his mouth shut and look at you as if you were trying to poison him. Each time we caringly prepare a little meal, he spits it out and demands milk, we retreat for a few days before preparing the next attempt. Hopefully this'll change over time. I really hope I don't have to deal with a fussy teenager who refuses the family meal, insisting we make him a special dish of paper-mache, and bag-clips, to be downed with a bottle of milk.

​We've started to make a little progress with porridge, with some of it getting swallowed [although most ending up in his hands, hair and on our clothes]. But at least it's a step forward.